Instant Gratification, Productive Orange Football Consumer, POF

Wireless Router

My buddy Zach doesn’t have a wireless router hooked up in his condo. He’s always said I could plug straight into the wall if I wanted to use the internet when I’m at his condo. So in order to do any kind of work, (and the internet is my work) I have to plug into the wall? Might as well hook me up to a dial tone and kick me in the balls. At least I could hear the dial-up connection noise from my aol.com youth, “You’ve Got Mail” days. And my ball pain would help alleviate the icky belly that I’m experiencing.
I also need the flexibility to move around with my laptop and ipad. The ipad has quickly become my new best shitting friend. I hate the thought of having to take a shit alone again. And Zach in his non-ownership of wireless internet really puts a hamper into my TradeNations Town that I’ve been working hard on building. My citizens can’t harvest crops, chop down trees or fashion a beautiful garment without any network connection.

After months of poking fun at him about the fact that it’s 2011 and he doesn’t own a wireless router he came to his senses and purchased one. However, after he ate 20mg he’s been on the phone with customer service speaking in circles trying to get it connected. It’s too funny. If you ever get the chance to watch an adderall junkie try to communicate with someone not optimized take it. It’s just too funny.

-AJ
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